Summer as a Single Mom :)

I spent all day putting pics with my last post and I kept losing them, and having to redo it, and they still aren't quite how I want it, but I promise I will get better. Grrr. . .at leadt I'm trying.

I guess I should first explain my title. Kevin had two summer blocks of anatomy and physiology at UVU this summer, which involved an open lab, so he would leave the house at about 6 am for work, go to school, then hit lab, and get home at about 11 pm. He also worked Saturdays, and was 1st counselor in the stake YM presidency, and in charge of their Zions camp, so if I was lucky I saw him on Sunday evenings. So my choice was to sit home, or figure out how to have fun with a brand new, newborn and a two year old.

We had decided to sell our condo that spring, and we had a very promising walk-thru in late June. It was an energetic older man, who was going to do a lease to own. It wasn't an ideal situation, but the market is so slow, we weren't sure if we would get any other offers. After praying and feeling very good about it, we set-up an appointment to meet at the title company, and since he wanted to move very quickly we got packing. This man stopped by our condo almost everyday and even attended our ward that Sunday. I packed by myself with the girls continously for about a week, and we rallied family to help us get out quick. It was so difficult to do this with two little girls, and still recovering from the delivery. We moved into my parents house over the fourth of July weekend, and rushed to get everything cleaned up. When we went to sign the papers, our buyer was nowhere to be found, and we haven't heard from him since. It was devastating to be let down like this, but we felt that our decision to move was inspired so we tried to stay optimistic. It took almost two months but we finally got a nice young couple to buy it, after we dropped our price even more than we had wanted too.

It was really hard to leave the first house we had bought together. It was a wonderful neighborhood and we have so many memories. It was the first place we brought both our babies home to, and the place where we watched Brae grow. I loved so much about it, from the dusty pink we had painted Brae's room, to the view from the window where we would watch all the things happening outside, to our big bed where we would all watch movies together. It was very emotional, but I have realized that all the love and memories we created there are always go to be with me. I hope the next family will enjoy it as much as we have. It will be a place in my mind I can always visit and see my girls as little as they are now, moments frozen in time, with chubby little hands, and big sloppy kisses, where I will never forget her little curls bouncing as she skipped ahead of me towards the door.

Summer Fun

We are already winding down our summer, and I haven't written about any of it, so I'm going to do that the nest few posts. We started this summer 2 weeks before Memorial Day by welcoming baby Berkley Kate on May 14. She weighed 7.11 and was 18.5 inches long. Braelyn used to tell everyone that I had a purple care bear in my tummy, so we joked that she would be disapointed when she saw it was actually a human baby. Well right after I delivered her, they put her in my arms, and I've been present at enough births to know she wasn't crying very loud. I was getting pretty nervous but the nurse didn't seem to get bothered until it was long enough that she started turning purple. She grabbed her and patted her pretty hard until she got ticked off enough that she really started wailing. The nurse just said she knew big sis wanted a purple care bear, and was doing her best to be that!
Our little Berkster has been such a joy. She is so bubbly and laughs and smiles a lot. She doesn't like to be put down, but is content to just look around when you are holding her. It wasn't too hard transitioning to two, but it was very hard to go back to sleepless nights and lugging around all the stuff that comes with a baby. Braelyn is a great helper and loves to go get her binky for her. I found her leaving Berkley's room the other day, right after I had put her down for a nap. I asked her why she was in there and she replied, "Just had to talk to the Berkster." They really do get along well and I'm very grateful for that.
A little over a week after that my cousins had a joint farewell/homecoming so that is how we spent our Memorial Day, and it was fun to show the baby off. Braelyn loves to go to Grandma Roberts' house and jump on the trampoline and play with the older girl cousins. Later that week my Grandma Moon, Kelle and Kylie came out and we had dinner together to celebrate Grandma's birthday. Braelyn had just started getting interested in birthdays and talked incessantly that week and for days after about "Munga Moon's birthday." She also really loves Kellee and would follow her around all night if she could.
We decided to bless Berkley on Father's Day, when she was about four weeks old. It was a small group, but was a wonderful day. Some of my strongest memories of blessing birth girls is the hours I spend getting dinner ready while they have to just watch me from the bouncy seat. I really love getting them into their dresses. Berkley was adorable in her short white party dress. She is an adorable baby, and looked like a doll that day. The blessing was beautiful and she didn't make a peep during it.
We had a little scare right after Berkley was born when the pediatrician wasn't sure if her intestines and bowels were fully formed and connected. We worried she would have to have major surgery immediately. Gratefully we found out, they were connected, but the doctor still wanted us to see a specialist at Primary Children's. We saw that doctor when she was 5 days old, and he told us there were some problems with her sphincter and that we have to perform some painful treatments everyday at home. He also said he wanted to run some more tests in a few weeks. We left that visit worried about heart conditions, kidney problems, and nerve issues that could eventually cause her to not walk. I was so overwhelmed that my perfect baby might have to deal with some scarey things in the future, and I felt like it was my fault she had come to this world with possible problems. It's difficult to be a new mom and to not feel like your love and protection will just fix everything. It was a long six weeks, but after having more testing done, we got the wonderful news that Berkley was fine, and that there were no apparent major conditions right now. It was a test of faith, and we knew we could handle anything the Lord saw fit to give us, but we were so relieved that the testing looked good, and are very thankful to the wonderful doctors, and the fact that we had access to this care.
Towards the end of June, I was getting pretty stircrazy being stuck around the house, so I decided to take the girls out to the cabvin with my family. Kevin had a very intense school schedule so he wasn't able to go. I was nervous and completely overpacked so I could be ready for anything. The girls were wonderful on the car rides, and Braelyn had a great time being outside. There is a swing for her under the deck and she would swing forever and sing "A Whole New World" over and over. She loved to go on the fourwheeler and got up early to go with Papa and Tay to "take care" of the pot gut population one morning. When she got back she brimming over with excitement and kept telling me, "Tay shoot the guts!" Then my mom told her that when she got older she could shoot my BB gun. She turned to me and said, "Yeah, I shoot the baby guts!" I said, "No, not baby guts, bb gun." And she replied, "And the daddy guts, and mommy guts!" I was laughing to hard to worry about violence craving two year old girl.

We did it!

Once we got our gear set up we got our timing chips, and they had volunteers write our numbers on our arms and calves. The girl crouched down to write it on his right calf, and he lifted his shorts all the way up, thinking she was writing on his thigh. She had such a startled look when she got an eyeful of white thigh. After that we headed over to the pool. We staked out a spot for our bags then settled in and watched everyone else. It was so cold we were shivering. They finally got the kids race started then, then they started calling for swimmers. You lined up according to how fast you swam becasue it was a staggered start. We had no idea so we just wandered over when it looked like we were towards the end. People just kept lining up behind us and we debated that we were too far in front, but we decided to just stay where we were, and figured people would pass us if they needed to. Taryn got in first and after her first two lanes, the announcer made a joke that there would be a special prize if you didn't get your hair wet, because she was swimming with her whole head above water. I got in and got through my first lap okay, then everyone started cathcing up to me. I felt like I was dragging my feet, and couldn't get a full breathe. I started feeling panicky and thought there is no way I can do this, "but Dad was behind me and said, "You're fine, just keep moving, and try to swim the next one." I felt okay then and knew I woulod just have to try my best. I kept trying different strokes, but if I did the back stroke I would veer all over the lane, and if I tried under water I just couldn't hold my breath. We did finally finish and hurried to change and get on the bikes.
The race course started on state street, so we were nervous about getting hit by a car. Taryn started out in front and she was so funny to watch because she looked like an old lady out for a leisurly ride. Everyone else was bent low over the handle bars but she was sitting straight up, just looking around at everything. We finally had to pass her because she was not moving to quickly. After the big downhill, I was in front and I didn't know if I was supposed to stay on the road or turn onto the bike trail and the volunteer just stood there with his arms crossed saying, "Road, road." I started swerving and about caused a crash before I figured out that meant stay on the road. We started up the hill and I got confused about gears and ended up too high and had to jump off my bike before I tipped sideways, and almost caused another pile-up. Taryn and I had to walk our bikes up, but Dad made it up both times. He hung back with us, probably because he knew we had no idea what we were doing. He kept encouraging me to just keep my legs moving, so I just repeating that to myself.
We finally started the run after a very long wait for the bathroom. Taryn and my dad were able to keep up much quicker pace than me, but I just wanted to keep running. My dad slowed down a bit and ran with me until we caught up to Taryn on the second lap, when she stopped to put trash in the garbage can. I just kept running, and only had to stop once when I got a cramp in my shoulder. As I crossed the street the police officer and volunteer directing traffic motioned me to keep coming, but the car didn't stop and bumped me, then she just stayed stopped in the middle of the road. I had to run around the car! The last leg through the park seemed to go on for a long time, but Taryn and Dad were waiting to cheer me on at the end. It was pretty cool to hear them announce my name, it meant I had actually finished a triathlon.
It was so neat to do this with my family. We weren't out to race or get great times, we just wanted to finish, and we all did that. I would not have been able to do it without their encouragment and support. It was neat to do something that I would have never considered myself able to do, and it gave me motivation to always challenge myself, and to remember how much can be accomplished with love and support.

Just Do It

I stopped using this after some technical malfunctions, but today is a good day to start doing it again, and maybe even figuring out some of the tricks. :)

Today I participated in a triatholon with my Dad and sister. The idea started about 8 months ago when Kevin told me he wanted to do one. I scoffed and thought he was insane. Why would anyone do that of their own free will? I hated doing the fun run in junior high. Well a few months later I found myself very pregnant and reading a magazine article in the doctor's office about fun things to do this summer. It mentioned the Share-A-Smile triatholon. I thought it my hormone induced craziness that it would be a fun thing to do as a family. They had a novice level that seemed challenging but not too grueling. I sent an e-mail out to my family asking them to join me, and I signed myself up that day so that I couldn't back out. My dad quickly signed on and after a little coercing Taryn agreed as well. Dad and Kevin thought the novice level was too easy, and convinced us to do the full race. I started to get a little nervous. Fast forward three months, I now had a brand new baby and a race deadline looming. The nerves grew worse. I started slowly training but we were soon engrossed in a move to my parent's house along with the rest of our busy lives, but I wouldn't let anyone back out. I was still thinking, "How bad could this really be?"
About 2 months before the race I started really trying to work out, and my first time on the treadmill I could barely do 2/10ths of a mile! And when we went swimming as a family and my mom, who was a lifeguard, tried to show us what to do, I started having elaborate day dreams about concoting a story in order to get our entry fees refunded.
I just kept trying to work out and it slowly became easier and I could go longer. I was so excited the day I ran 2 miles, even when I had to take a break. But I still wanted to get out of doing the race. I asked Taryn on my birthday, if we could try and get out of it, and she said no! We had paid our money and we were going to do this. My dad tried to give his spot to one of the boys and when I told Taryn he was weasling out, she called him and told him he was doing it too.
We finally tested our bikes the day before and we laughed as realized how unprepared we might be. But we were going to finish this no matter what and we kept saying, that at the very least we weren't going to actually die doing it. That was about the extent of our confidence.

The night before Taryn and I had a terrible time and didn't get much sleep. We kept saying how stupid this was that we were actually going to do this. But we grabbed our energy bars and Gatorade and pile into the truck before the sun was up. Taryn had a terrible headache, and I kept unrolling the window because I thought I was going to throw up. In the parking lot, it looked like we were among a bunch of pros. We wheeled our bikes over to the racks and I couldn't even lift my bike on! But we were here and we were going to do this!