Time marches on

I'm not meeting my goal of being able to write everyday, so I'm getting more behind. I'm going to switch formats and write about my current day and maybe another post that goes back through summer, so maybe I can get it all written about.

The girls and I have all been a little under the weather this week, but it is so nice outside that I feel very guilty if I don't get them outside and moving. Yesterday we cleaned out the playhouse and I spent the better part of the afternoon painting the inside. Braelyn was in and out playing, and then I didn't see her for awhile. I went inside to make sure everything was okay, and she had fallen asleep at the counter while she was eating her lunch! We had to run some errands in the afternoon, then after dinner we ran down to the park. She loves being able to climb and I love not having to tell her to be quiet or get down. She even hung upside down on the bars (with dad's help). I really love when Kevin has some free time to join us. It is wonderful to just sit with Berkley and watch him play with Brae. He loves to run and be wild with her and she really loves trying to keep up with him.

This week I have been trying to find Brae a preschool or dance class. I thought I had one picked out, but I ran into a bad review about it online. For some reason this sent terror through me that I almost made a bad decision and sent her somewhere that might not have been safe or enjoyable. There is so much about parenthood that causes guilt and fear and you try to not let that interfere too much, but now I was worried about sending her somewhere, that I could not make sure she was okay all the time. I decided to go to Ikea, and they have a playland, and I was nervous all morning about just dropping her off there. I thought I might make her stay with me, but when we walked in she saw the kid's area and ran right over. At first it looked like she would not meet the height requirement and I was slightly relieved, but the attendant said she was tall enough. Brae was so confident and ready to play that I knew she would be okay. The have pretty strict security measures which eased my mind a little. After my shopping I picked her up and she was excited to see me, but said she had fun playing. I thought it was a big moment for both of us, as we each learn to allow more independence. As we were walking out she grabbed for my hand and told me I was her best friend. Who would think that my two-year old would be consoling me after our separation? We stopped at McDonald's for lunch, and Braelyn loved the playplace. She is usually pretty nervous about big slides, but she found a nice little boy who helped her go down a really big one, and she was so pleased with herself that I couldn't get her to stop to even eat french fries. It is so nice to see other little kids be so kind, especially little boys, it makes it easier to think of her going to school, or even eventually dating, when I realize that there are other moms teaching their kids to be kind and considerate. She had a lot of fun and we spent a good hour letting her run wild. Berkley was as patient as you could expect for a baby, and even enjoyed watching the kids run for a bit. She is so tolerant and easy to please. She has added such a calming spirit to our family, and is such a joy to tote around. We haven't really decided who she looks most like, but she doesn't really resemble Braelyn that much, so I was hoping she would look just like me. Her eyes started really blue, but are getting darker, and when I was buckling her into her car seat I saw an absolute mini-me version of Kevin. Maybe it's just there matching bald heads, but I think I will have another doll-faced version of Kevin running around.

Since they haven't felt very good, the girls have been sleeping more this week. The other night while I was feeding Berkley, Braelyn needed some one on one attention and wandered downstairs to find her Uncle Tay. After telling him some stories she curled up and fell asleep next to him on the couch. Berkley zonked out this afternoon after we got home, and she makes me laugh because she just chubs out, and I love all her little rolls.